Finding True Happiness Starts In The Mind
“Happiness blooms naturally in the hearts of those who are inwardly free. It flows spontaneously, like a mountain spring after April showers, in minds that are contented with simple living.”
Where is the first place you think of when trying to find happiness in your life?
For most people, it starts with their possessions. Let’s be real here. Most people worry too much about what they have or don’t have that they forget where true happiness begins and ends.
According to Buddhist nun, Gen Kelsang Nyema, we need to open our hearts and minds and look deep inside for happiness. Happiness lies within our own hearts and minds. She has a beautifully simple way about her that is incredibly peaceful and we can learn so much from her passion for happiness.
Happiness Is All In Your Mind: Gen Kelsang Nyema
She starts by asking 2 questions.
1- Are you having a good day?
2- Why are you having a good day and if you are not, why?
Everything in life is depended on those two questions and how we respond. If we are negative and drawn in by the negative aspects of life then we will not have a good day will we. No matter how hard we try, outside and external influences will rob us of our happiness.
This is why we need to look deep within for the happiness that God has put there. In fact, it really isn’t happiness at all… it is known as joy, pure joy. Joy is that which fills your soul with happiness no matter what happens in life. It is the manifestation of unconditional love that dwells in our hearts and minds and motivates us to seek out those things which brings us pleasure.
We seek happiness because we seek love. Love is happiness and when we find that love, it is manifested in our actions and the happiness from the inside is brought forth to others through our actions.
On the other hand, if you truly want to have a happy day no matter the circumstances, you need to see happiness from a different perspective. Her teacher, Geshe Kelsing Gyotso states, “Much of the time, our mind is like a balloon in the wind, blown here and there by external circumstances. When things are going well, we feel happy but if something doesn’t go our way, we’re not happy.”
We need to see the world in a bigger picture and not just our selfish reach for happiness but be compassionate to others for if we are causing unhappiness for others then it will come back to us in karma.
She goes on to say that “As long as our reasons for having a good day are a list of external conditions, then were not going to have the stable happiness we all want.”
That is an unbelievable statement because most of us put the blame on others, or circumstances for our unhappiness and we lose sight of what real happiness entails.
What Does Your Happiness Depend On?
“Happiness is NOW! It isn’t tomorrow. It isn’t yesterday. Happiness is like a morning glory: Yesterday’s won’t bloom again; tomorrow’s hasn’t opened yet. Only today’s flower can be enjoyed today. Be happy this very moment, and you’ll learn how to be happy always.”
If you can’t control your circumstances or the people you are with or meet then will they cause your unhappiness?
Of course not. But why do we believe that statement?
It means our happiness is left in the hands of others and we’ve given control of our lives over to others and I know I don’t want to give up control of my life to no one but God. We end up being at the whim of our daily circumstances.
What Do We Need To Be Happy?
1- Stop outsourcing our happiness and happiness to others – This means we have to take complete responsibility for our own happiness or unhappiness. As hard is that to accept, we must look deeply into our own hearts and minds to begin taking back control of what we feel.
Stop attributing our happiness or unhappiness to what is going on externally. We need to look within for our own happiness and own that. Stop blaming others for our unhappiness. The only blame should bo on ourselves for being so selfish.
2- Happiness and unhappiness are just states of mind – The real causes of our happiness or unhappiness depends on what is in our minds. That state controls what we feel and then we react to it. Instead, your happiness depends on a peaceful positive state of mind. That way, you can withstand anything that comes your way and still feel the joy of life.
It is how we are responding to everything around us that determines whether we are happy or not. Not outside circumstances because they change all the time.
How Is This Done?
Cultivating A Stable Peace Of Mind
“The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance; the wise man grows it under his feet.”
We do it through cultivating a stable peace of mind. We cultivate this peaceful and positive state of mind through meditation. All meditation is, is a practice of concentrated focus on what we want to put our attention to. To cultivate this peaceful and positive peace of mind, we concentrate our energies on increasing
awareness of how we are responding to the things around us and changing those things that make us unhappy. This is a way to enhance both our personal and spiritual growth and become closer to God.
According to Vlad Dolezal of An Amazing Mind , there are 5 Simple Ways to Increase Your Peace of Mind.
He lists them out below:
1-Do your most daunting task first thing in the morning –
2-Let go of things you don’t control
3-Don’t worry about what others are thinking
4-List 3 things you love about your situation right now
5-Walk to a window, look outside, and take a single deep breath
Are Joy And Happiness One In The Same?
“Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Happiness comes and goes but joy is everlasting. Meditation teaches us to remain in loving kindness to the world around us and become the best version of unconditional love we can be to bring it to the world. How much happiness we bring depends on how much joy we feel. The more joyful we are the more we can
bring happiness to the world.
Sadness is part of the world but it doesn’t have to take us over. Being conscious of our thoughts, moods, and words ultimately brings happiness in our awareness of self. You can’t control others but you can control yourself that is why you have the choice to be happy even if things aren’t going your way. Happiness is a state of mind and whatever state you are in that is what you are feeling.
Go beyond your feelings and learn to calm the mind. It is there you will find the peace and happiness you have been searching all your life. I hope this 3-Part series has uplifted your spirits in such a way as to give you cause to rethink your own life in a way that will take you on the road to a rich and warm happiness that you can give to others through unconditional love.
Learning to find happiness is not an easy task but if you open your heart and mind happiness will find you