Finding True Happiness In Life Part 2

How To Own Your Own Happiness

We live in a world where we blame others for our unhappiness and look for things to bring us fulfillment. Finding happiness in life seems to be fleeting yet we can’t put our finger on what exactly gives us true happiness. Happiness is like walking in a circle with our eyes closed waiting for the right moment to open them in wide-eyed wonder but disappointment comes when we don’t get what we want.

Bishop TD Jakes tells us we need to own our happiness and be in charge of what makes us happy. Stop looking for others to fill a void that you should be filling yourself. If you are feeling empty, don’t look for others to make you happy. You have to be the one in charge of your own happiness in life.

We only have a finite time available on Earth so make the most of your time and fill it with all the happiness you can… no matter what the circumstances are. That’s the prescription for finding true happiness in life!

5 Steps To Owning Your Own Happiness With  TD Jakes

Bishop TD Jakes is interviewed on the Steve Harvey Show and talks about the 5 Steps To Owning Your Own Happiness. His words of wisdom are inspiring to anyone who wants to know what real happiness is all about.

Steve – What can I do to be happy?

Bishop Jakes – The five steps are…

1- Own your own happiness – Don’t demand that others make you happy. Be responsible for your own brand of happiness. Your kids, your spouse, your jobs, even a big house won’t make you happy.

Be responsible for doing those things that bring joy into your heart independently of life, people and money. They can’t bring you happiness. Take responsibility of that peace and joy that lives inside of your heart and not your stuff.

Challenge Your Happiness Story

2- The second thing is to challenge your own story – Don’t torment yourself by how you see your life. You tell yourself a story as if it were the definitive truth. It’s really just a perspective of the truth. The narrative you tell yourself needs to be challenged. Change the way you talk to yourself about who you are, what’s happened to you and where you’re going to do in your life. You wrote the script and you can rewrite your story. It’s up to you to change the dialogue going on.

Enjoy The Journey Not The Destination

3- The third thing is to enjoy the journey not the destination – Too many people delay their happiness until they get to a certain level in life. What happens if you don’t get there? You’ve lost all that time you could have been enjoying the moments. Enjoy the whole step, the whole process everyday that you are alive. Strive for what you want and celebrate not just at the finish line but along the whole path.

Steve – That’s so true because I hear people talking about making a million dollars when they haven’t even made $25K. There’s got to be joy in the process.

Bishop Jakes – If you don’t see yourself as valuable, nobody else will.

Make Your Relationships Count

4- The fourth thing is to make relationship count – Everything is about relationships. Life is filled with them so you can’t get away without them.

First of all, it’s your relationship with God. That is what is most important. As long as you know someone’s in charge you don’t have to bear the brunt of the responsibility and weight of the world He’s the boss!

Enjoy the relationship with yourself. If you don’t like yourself, it makes it hard for others to like you. When you walk into other people’s atmosphere they draw you into the cosmos of their own drama and if they are filed with drama you get caught up in the cyclone of their drama.

Enjoy the relationship with yourself and anyone else who comes in and enters a party you’ve already started. Take the time to enjoy the relationships because there is no fruit without relationships. You cannot be fruitful by yourself. You are no more than the relationships you surround yourself with.

Balance Your Work Time With Your Play Time

5- The fifth thing is to balance work with play – You can’t do all of either one and be successful. To those who much is given, much is required. If you work hard make sure you make time for play to balance your life out.

Balance is the key. Balance with your kids, your spouse, your friends, your job… even your life. This balance gives others a better perspective of who we are. Everything is not serious all the time. Add some fun to the seriousness. It puts too much pressure on us to be the person you were created to be.

Steve – You have to enjoy the journey and the process. Don’t live in misery and not enjoy what you have.

Bishop Jakes – Let’s talk about children. People don’t understand about children. It’s not what you leave to them that makes them great, it’s what you leave inside them. And if you leave enough in them you won’t have to worry about what they do. Your love will win over them with simple principals.

This inspiring message is something we all need to hear and put into action. Happiness is a choice that you make and everyday is a new choice to make. Life is  a long-distance run not a sprint. Enjoy your life everyday… don’t throw any days away. They are too precious to leave dangling between heartache and joy.

Discover how to find your true happiness in part 3 of our series on finding happiness in life.

 

Finding Happiness In An Unhappy World

finding happiness

Finding True Happiness In Life

finding happiness

Are you happy?

The reason I ask this because according to 2016 World Happiness Report, people in the United States are only the thirteenth happiest people in the world. For the richest and most influential country on the planet, this doesn’t seem to make sense. But let’s delve a bit further and see how this affects you.

What makes you happy?

Is it family, friends, money, your career? All of the above… or none of the above?

You see, happiness is a state of mind not a place we go to or based on the current or past events of our lives. Happiness is like the air we breathe. We can either accept it and let it flow through our bodies pumping us up with a life-giving force or dismiss it and allow it make us sick. You, my friend, have the final decision on what you want to do when it comes to finding real happiness.

So let me ask you again. What makes you happy?

Finding happiness in life is actually a misnomer. We don’t have to find happiness… we need to experience happiness. It’s not about looking for something to make you happy but opening your heart and embracing happiness.

How To Live a Happy Life

The science of happiness has determined that happy people have specific ways they think and act that impacts their sense of well-being and happiness. It goes much deeper than just feeling happy. Many look at happiness as a result of their action but happiness drives your actions.

Take a look at your life. When you are happy, it inspires what you do but it’s the complete opposite when you are sad. But what if you didn’t have to rely on feelings to be happy? What if what you do everyday is a product of a belief is a higher power?

What if you could effectively erase worry from your thoughts? Do you think you could allow happiness to enter in.  Jesus tells us in Matthew 6:25-34: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?

Most people based their happiness on how much or how little they have to worry about.  Living with worry only spoils the happiness that surrounds you. Quality of life should have no bearing on how happy you are. The rich are not any more happier than the poor contrary to many believe.

In fact, many of the poor throughout the world are much happier than people who have so much. Studies show that the poor in many countries base their happiness on factors such as gratitude, love and care while those who pursue materialistic endeavors tend to use the objects as way to find happiness.

Henry David Thoreau once said this about happiness, “Happiness is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder.”

If you search for happiness your whole life then it will be all in vain but if you allow happiness to live in your heart, it will grow like a flower. This is how I learned to be happy. I could have been mad at the world after losing my first girlfriend to leukemia but I lifted everything up to the Lord.

In Philippians 4:4-7, it tells us to “Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice ! 5 Let your forbearing spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near. 6 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, shall guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

This gives us a road map on how to live a happy life.

How To Find Joy In Life

Psychotherapist Jude Bijou MA, MFT states, “Joy is an emotion, and emotions are wordless. They’re pure physical sensations in our bodies. We express the emotion of joy in many physical ways.”   Happiness should be physically exuded in everything we do. It isn’t about what we don’t have but being grateful for what we do have.

When I recently had major reconstructive surgery on my back, the pain was overwhelming but I still felt joy. Why? I was grateful for the health I did have. Pain was something I was used to for over ten years but I didn’t have control over that pain. To live a happier life, I needed to focus on things that I could control such as my mindset which is a major key to happiness.

So, how do you rewire your brain for happiness?

Here’s A Short List Of Things You Can Do To Change Your Mindset About Happiness

icon-check Build different bridges with your thoughts – This means, instead of building a negative bridge, start building positive bridges and then re-enforce those positive thoughts at so that our brains can adapt and change according to our everyday behaviors.

icon-check Practice self compassion – Compassionate people have shown the ability to see beyond those things that cause unhappiness ans are able to focus on both love and care which are vital to how happy people act.

icon-check Personal awareness – So often we live on autopilot that we forget to be aware of our surroundings. We don’t see the beauty and the wonder that is sitting right in front of us. We’re too worried about our bills, the office or even what to make for dinner that night. Our brains ruminate or go over the same things that it blocks out our chance to experience life in all its grandeur.

icon-check Commit random acts of kindness – These random acts of kindness set off s mini explosions of happiness in our brains. They give us hope, purpose and belonging in a world that sometimes can be very cruel. Giving is like a drug, the more you experience the more you want to keep giving.

The more you decide in your mind to be happy, the easier it will be to stay happy. When you concentrate on your personal happiness as well as the happiness of others, you make happiness a daily habit for the good of the world.

Experiencing Love And Happiness In The World Today

love and happiness

Love is one of the most important key to finding happiness in the world. Without it, we let misery creep in and allow ourselves to feel sorry for our situation.

Why is love so important to happiness.

Love and happiness have a connection that was given to us by God himself. God loves us so much that He wants us to experience that joy. We see this in bible verses such as: “Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:4, and “In your presence is fullness of joy, and at your right hand are pleasures forevermore,” Psalm 16:11.

According to Arthur Dobrin, D.S.W., Professor Emeritus, Hofstra University and author of over twenty books, “Whichever way you find happiness, it is always accompanied by love, for happiness is ultimately the love of life, the celebration of living. The mark of happiness is that you are sensitive to the world around you, that you acknowledge your dependence upon your surroundings and that you are filled with loving-kindness.”

We are to seek out love and as well as give it and happiness will be a huge part of the process. George Sand probably distilled down to it’s perfect meaning when he said, There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved.”

Love changes us in so many ways. It makes us feel good, it gives us hope in others and it allows us to express the true nature of our being.. that is, to just love no matter what! No only do love and happiness go hand in hand… they were made for each other.

Love is an action verb. It must be acted upon. It is through those actions that we not only derive happiness but give it as well. The world doesn’t like others to be happy but you can make the decision right now to live in happiness and learn what makes people happy. Once you know this, happiness is yours to keep.

Want to know how you can find inner peace, unconditional love and true happiness in God’s kingdom?

You can find it in my #1 bestselling book on Amazon.com entitled “Summoned To Love – A Spiritual Blueprint For Rediscovering Inner Peace, Unconditional Love, And True Happiness.”

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How To Find True Happiness In Life

key to happiness

How To Find True Happiness

key to happiness

Ever felt like finding true happiness has eluded you your whole life?

Maybe you’ve had a few instances of happiness but they were so short lived you can barely remember them. I got ya! It seems like everyone is so miserable these days and you don’t have a clue as to why this happening to you also.

We look all over the place for true happiness but we forget the first rule of happiness… do what makes you happy. You don’t look for happiness, you let it come to you.

We find it in the little things in life. Ever thought about doing something wild and crazy but then your logical side spoke up as if it were your mother and told you to stop fooling around and get busy doing something constructive?

Those are happiness killers. The things that stop us from having fun and expressing ourselves.

What makes you happy?

What’s stopping you from the things that make you happy?

Excuses are the bane of anyone trying to find happiness in a world filled with sorrow and depression.

According to Professor Myrna Weisman and associates, roughly a quarter of the population has suffered some form of clinical depression during their lifetime and a further 48% has suffered from depression severe enough to incapacitate them for more than two weeks. This is also taken from Robert E. Lane’s book “Loss Of Happiness” and it shows that society is becoming less and less happy and has gone to taking out its frustrations on one another.

If you want to be happy you need to examine what makes you happy, why they make you happy and how you go about including those things in your life.

What Are 7 The Keys To Finding True Happiness

Worry is not one of then but the mere fact that we are so filled with worry makes it so hard to be happy. There are many ways to be happy but let me share some of the most powerful keys to finding happiness.

1- Faith It may seem like a no-brainer but too many people go round without faith in themselves or a higher being.  As a Christian, my faith keeps me grounded and allows me to stay away from temptations that would get me in trouble, from people who may try and take advantage of me as well as situations that may compromise my values. The more faith you have the happier your life tends to be. This isn’t just words but a promise. Countless studies have been done to see why people of faith  are happier. Their conclusion? People of faith have something to look forward to that is filled with joy. That gives them contentment others just can’t match.

2- Learn To Savor Live’s Pleasures – You can’t be happy if you don’t experience what life has to offer. How often do you forget the good times in your life while ruminating over that spilt glass of milk or forgetting someone’s name? Savor the good times and forget the bad times. Go out and spell the flowers, Learn how to go out and splurge on yourself without feeling guilty and indulge in what life has to offer. Every day is a chance to see all the beauty God had made for us.

3- Have A Set of Friends Who Have Your Back –  Friends are given to us to experience life from all points of view.  They are there in good times and bad, to laugh at our silly jokes and to make connections that go deeper than just what’s on the outside. Most of our happy memories come from the experiences we share with others.

4- Stop Living Safe – How boring life would be if we never took chances. Where is the fun in being safe. Live like you may not see tomorrow, love like it may be your last time and create adventures that bring fun into your life. It’s not about throwing caution to the wind but taking calculated risk that brings the most rewards.

5- Find Your Balance Point – Life should not be all about work and no play and vise versa. It should be balanced to the point where happiness has a chance to breathe. When the tipping point goes beyond your set balance, unhappiness and misery fills your heart. The main goals of balance is to allow the body and mind to be fulfilled and at peace. If you have neither then you must rebalance you life and add or detract those things that push your life out of balance.

6- Reposition Your Thought Patterns – Too often we take the “I want”  stance in our lives and this leads straight to unhappiness. The more we have, the greater chance of us drowning in possessions instead of experiences. Switch your thoughts to “I Am” and you’ll see the difference. It’s all about piece of mind and believing in yourself. That leads to true happiness and empowerment. Once you have the power to be happy through the mind, you will know the source of your happiness and be able to find happiness wherever you go.

7- Appreciation & Gratitude – If you don’t have these two things you will never be truly happy no matter what you do. Appreciation helps us feel good about  who we are, what we have and the people in your life. The same thing goes for gratitude. Thanking God and showing it in your daily excursions brings a peace of mind that helps you during your struggles. Don’t underestimate the power of a good thank you or a pat on the back. Those things are as important as anything else in life.

What is The Meaning Of Happiness

Do you know what the meaning of happiness is? Happiness is not the final destination but takes real effort to maintain. We equate happiness with satisfaction and quality of life but it goes much deeper than that. Even though our moods fluctuate, we control whether we stay happy or become depressed.

Research has found that the more our activities coincide with our values the happier we are.  We get meaning from doing those these things but our problems arise from where we put our priorities in the wrong place.

Does your priorities jell with your activities? If not, you may want to think about changing your activities. Happiness alone isn’t enough for us to feel fulfilled but chasing happiness is not the answer.

 “It is the very pursuit of happiness that thwarts happiness.” Viktor Frankl

In an article entitled “The Problem With Happiness” dated November 17, 2011 bears this out. It states, “People putting the greatest emphasis on being happy reported 50 percent less frequent positive emotions, 35 percent less satisfaction about their life, and 75 percent more depressive symptoms.”

How then do we find happiness?

What Does Happiness Mean To You

We must first decide what is important to each individual person. Then, bring a piece of that happiness and give it to others. This is how we derive meaning from that happiness. Happiness is nothing without meaning.

Here are things you can do to find the meaning of happiness in your own life.

1- Take responsibility for your own happiness and not leave it up to others to bring it to you.

2- Commit yourself to a higher purpose. What is your mission on earth. When you find your purpose you are able to commit yourself to bringing God’s love to the world through your higher purpose.

3- Cultivate awareness of both your surroundings and your thoughts for they can bring great happiness or great sorrow. Be aware of the moment and make that moment count.

4- Cultivate positive relationships that help you grow as a person. Without them, you will be not know the essence of loving others. Selfishness does not breed happiness.

5- Learn to be the most authentic person you can be. This way you don’t have to hide behind a veil of secrecy. The more you let others see the real you the happier you can be in your own skin.

According to Michael Davidson. from his article “The Meaning of Happiness” he states “Happiness is the harmony between you and your life that you achieve through finding meaning in every moment.”

I think that sums up what being happy is all about. Now it’s your turn to make it work for you for you have the choice in all matters to be or not to be happy.

Want to know how to find real happiness?

You can find it in my #1 bestselling book on Amazon.com entitled “Summoned To Love – A Spiritual Blueprint For Rediscovering Inner Peace, Unconditional Love, And True Happiness.”

Summoned To Love

How To Find Lasting Happiness

how to find lasting happiness

How To Find Lasting Happiness

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Every day we have a chance to find happiness. What are you doing to elicit love and happiness to a world that is devoid of personal contact?

We spend far too much time on Facebook and Twitter and not enough time bringing happiness to the world.

What can you do to find your own brand of happiness?

What must you do to walk through the valley of joy?

Are you getting the most fun out of life? It might seem like an easy question to answer but most of us need to be brutally honest with ourselves. It’s all about finding lasting happiness.

No one with any brain whatsoever can deny that being happy is good advice, but unfortunately for many of us, it can be a difficult request to follow. It shouldn’t be, but the quest has become a burden to many and has led them down a deep and narrow path filled with both decadence and sin.

We reach out in all sorts of strange and unusual ways to find real happiness and still it escapes us but God wants us to be truly happy. We just need to surrender ourselves to His will and happiness will ultimately follow. This may sound like a fantasy to many but God has promised us new life in the spirit as found in 2 Corinthians 5:17:

“Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new
creature; the old things passed away; behold, new
things have come.”

If you find yourself looking in from the outside and wonder why so many other people seem to have every advantage in life while you are mired in the depths of despair, remember this; Everyone’s situation in life is different.

We can choose to become the masters of our own destiny by overcoming our emotions and make smart lifestyle and social choices. Positive choices can ensure we find ourselves happy at the end of the day. No matter what we face, we have the final choice in what we do. Or we can do the exact opposite and live apart from God’s love.

happy-family

Finding Lasting Happiness In Life

Here’s a simple fact: you can’t truly be happy unless you choose to be happy. When you choose to be happy, you are making a conscious decision about how you look at the world. You are taking personal responsibility over your outlook, rather than blaming outside forces for the way you feel.

Life is filled with all kinds of opportunities to experience happiness but too many of us spoil it by giving excuses as to why we can’t be happy.

Why is this?

What can I do to make happiness a reality?

Put quite simply, the happier you are, the healthier you will be. We know this is true because a wonderful connection between wellness and joy has been discovered. In March of 2013, doctors, psychiatrists and experts from the Mayo Clinic, Harvard University and National Institutes of Health all jumped on Twitter to hold a one-hour discussion about happiness.

According to Dr Friedman, a well-known psychiatrist with the Presbyterian-Weill Cornell Hospital in New York,he states, Happiness is hard to measure, but easy to recognize.” And that is so very true.

You can spot a happy person in an instant. They have a glow about them and give off a radiance of peacefulness and satisfaction. That may be due to the fact that happiness has now finally been officially linked to better health. This affects entire communities as well as individuals. Happiness can even lower the number of stress causing hormones in your body, and improve your immune function.

Just ask Laura Kubzansky, an associate professor at the Harvard School of Public Health who is a leader in studying the effects of those people who choose to have a positive outlook on life. She participated in a study whose results were released in 2007, which included over 6,000 women and men. It tracked 25 to 74-year-old individuals for two decades.

Those participants who were engaged in life and chose to face life’s troubles with enthusiasm and hopefulness actually had a lower risk of coronary heart disease. It seems that emotional vitality can actually make you healthier. This in turn causes you to feel better about yourself and your surroundings, which continues to make you happier about the world. When you choose to be happy, a wonderful cycle of health and joy begins.

Finding Lasting Happiness In God’s Love

Choosing God’s Love To Experience Real Joy A funny thing happens when we involve God in our lives. We see things from a different point of view. God’s love strengthens the bonds of friendship, love, and families in a way that we can never do on our own.

God calls us to seek happiness in him. We see this in bible verses such as:“Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”  Psalm 37:4, and “In your presence is fullness of joy, and at your right hand are pleasures forevermore,”  Psalm 16:11.

God loves us so much that He wants us to experience the joy that comes from His unconditional love. According to author Jon Bloom, “Pleasure is the measure of your treasure.”  There are many promises that God makes and they include being joyful and knowing His peace which are not temporary.

Jesus said, Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the
world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid” John 14:27.

Humans crave happiness but finding pleasure is not the same. Too many try to find it in sinful practices such as drugs, alcohol, and sex and get lost along the way. Your job is to seek God and you will see what real happiness is all about.

Finding lasting happiness is not about a quick fix but those things that bring joy to our hearts and pleasure to the world. Without God’s happiness, love and happiness would be a much bitter pill to swallow.

How do you go about finding lasting happiness?

You can find it in my #1 bestselling book on Amazon.com entitled “Summoned To Love – A Spiritual Blueprint For Rediscovering Inner Peace, Unconditional Love, And True Happiness.”

Summoned To Love